single , loser , both or neither

I look around and I see so many people, so different so diverse but there are a obvious few things that puts them all, atleast most of them, together. Its comfortable to be overtly critical about these people and about what they do and how they live, pretending or feeling right about what I believe and do. But then i decided to turn back and see , to actually take a step behind and tell myself "what if i were wrong". Now this could be seen as lack of faith or opening up to the possibilities of the could-be's.After all why should I always be right.

Let me start with a little confession. For a while now Ive been feeling a little lonely. It might be coz i spend a lot more time with myself than I used to, which was zilch. But coming to think of it I just realised that it actually bothered me that I am not with someone. Now relax,this is not going to be me whining about the fact that I am single. It sure is not. 8 out of 10 people out there are either committed or term themselves as having a boyfriend or a girl friend or both or any other way they wanna call it. The real question is, what exactly is going on. Its one thing to have identified someone from the opposite sex as an ideal match[sounds a lot simpler ..doesn't it??], a whole other thing to be parading your new find without actually any sense of committment, respect or in most cases, direction. And the funniest thing is, the association of the word "loser" for those who've avoided the trap. I ain't sticking up for the singles communinty nor am I terming all single people as "in control of their lives".

But if I am a loser because im 23 and I am still single, coz I know what i want, coz I can face the fact that I still haven't met the right one, coz I believe when the right one comes along I will hold on to her, cos then nothing could ever get in the way of me working things out no matter what. Then I dont mind being a loser after all. However, why am I not ok with everybody's attitude towards relationships . That its not really necessary you know where your going. Not to make a big deal out of how long you are together and jus be bothered about if your having fun.To actually go with intuition (a fancy word for "harmones" isn't it). Why does it freak me out to even consider anything of this sort. One of the things I cant accept is the ease with which people say "thats my ex" or "things didnt work out" or "that bitch ruined my life". Instead of it being a sign of one's inability to run a smooth relationship, that and a few other similarly weird things seem to determine the fanciness of one's social life. Does this what having a little spice in one's life mean???. As much as I'm convinced that I am living a sensible life , i must confess , I am equally doubtful if what I am doing is actually missing out on somethings you ought to have experienced at certain stages in life.